On the road again...

This face lift project for this blog isn't as simple as I thought it would be. It has been an endless search of something that I feel suits me. And right now...I do not have the time.

Tonight I pack to leave for Tennessee again. I am clueless as to how long I will be gone and thankfully I am at a point in my life where I don't have a job that I would have to rush back for. BUT...I do have J and she will be here in GA with her family. Last night, she made me promise that we will never spend another holiday apart. It was an easy promise to make. I hate this as much as she does. Thanksgiving and this Christmas are the first holidays since we've been together that we didn't spend together.

As far as posting here while I am gone, I don't think it will happen. Grandma has a computer but it is older than dirt and I have no patience with it. I tried when I was up there last month but it drove me nuts just waiting for it to boot up. I can hear someone mumbling how patience is a virtue but ha! It is a virtue that will forever escape my clutches.

When I do get back, we will probably be heading back out again. We were thinking of Times Square for New Year's but I think we decided against it. We decided to plan better for it next year and maybe head down to Savannah instead. If anyone else has a better suggestions on where to spend New Years, please tell.

I'm sure I will take tons of pictures and I will share what I can. Hey, and there is a good possibility that this will be my first white Christmas. *Crossing fingers*

Oh well.
So, Merry Christmas to all and if I don't make it back before it, Happy New Year too!

Change...

I'm thinking about given this blogger a face lift.
Honestly, this brown thing doesn't seem like me at all. And the ones they give you to choose from...suck. So I am on a mission. New layout or bust.

In other news...
I am about to head out of town again. Tennessee bound. Yeah, I know I was just there. But this time, my mom will be there. I haven't seen her since my surgery back in July/August.

LMAO...J just sang happy birthday to me in a Rugrats voice.

Anyhow, fair warning...a change is gonna come!

Neon Angels on the road to ruin...The Runaways movie!

It is no secret that I am a huge Joan Jett fan. And I'm sure anyone that is a Joan Jett fan knows that a movie is being made about The Runaways. I personally cannot wait to see this movie.

Movie Trailers - Movies Blog

Read the story here.
And if you are a fan of The Runaways, check out Cherie Curries book Neon Angels.

Two Oh Oh!

Yep...welcome to the 200th installment of Life Of Times/On The Surface.


I have been racking my brain since my last entry on what I should write about. I totally missed the 100th entry. The 150th entry escaped me too. But I was paying attention and didn't want to miss this one.

I thought that maybe I should do a "Back Then" entry but decided against it. Not much of the past matters to me anymore. (Don't worry though, "Back Then" isn't over.) I went through all my drawings and paintings to see if they would be good for this post, but nothing caught my eye. Then I thought I could write about J and I, but I rarely do that here and it would seem out of place.

Then it came to me...last night before I fell asleep. I'm going to write about Starr, since she is the reason I started this blog in the first place. It seems fitting...

Several years ago, I parked my Freightliner car carrier in the center lane of Dixie Highway. I was delivering cars and the dealership had no unloading zone for us trucks. It was the worst place in the world to be unloading cars. Only inches separated me from the speeding traffic on either side of my truck. But JM was one of my best customers and when he called, I never failed to show.

I pulled a 7 car Miller behind my truck and I was busy unloading the bottom rack, working the controls to the hydraulics to get the top rack high enough so I could unload. I popped the ratchet and was about to lean over to unhook the chain when pain lanced through my back like someone had just snapped an over-large rubber band across my back. It took my breath away and I turned my head in time to see a yellow SUV speeding off. I knew what happened. The driver skimmed me with his mirror.


I shook my head and stepped onto the bottom rack as more speeding cars passed so I could catch my breath. My back was stinging so bad. Finally feeling normal, I stepped back out to the road and unhooked the last of the chains. I jumped in the car and started to back off when a car pulled up behind me with its flashers on.



I sat in the car and waited, hoping they would realize that I was unloading and to move their car. A minute later, this drop dead gorgeous woman stepped out of the BMW with a cell phone to her ear. Curious, I jumped out the car I was in and met her at the back of the truck. She hung up the phone and she looked at me like she was furious and about to kick my ass. No fear though, I stepped up to her.



"Can I help you?" I asked. She looked like the 'take no shit' type so I acted accordingly. Held my head up high and stood with purpose.


All that anger in her face vanished. "Are you okay? I saw that guy hit you. I got his tag number and tried to get him to stop at the next light."


She said it in one long breath and I laughed, carefully. She did look like she was pretty mean, even under her apparent concern for my well-being.



"I'm fine. It only stung for about a minute."

"You got a cell? We should call the cops. I'm your witness."

"Nah, really. I'm fine. Besides, if I call the cops, they'll give me a ticket for unloading here."


Who knew that that would be the beginning of our friendship. We chatted for about thirty minutes, exchanged numbers, and made plans to hang out. I think I can speak for both of us when I say that we have been best friends ever since.

To Starr...and thank you for the push you gave me to start this thing. LYMY!

Surrender

In the silence, its cold.
Welcomed weight of the blanket and a warm bed.
Not quite the warmth I need.
Then she touched me.
Hands of ice quickly thawed.

From within her, somehow she ignites the heat of the sun.
Simple whispers. A simple touch.
Closer to me, my heart, my soul.
"I don't want you to leave," tickles my ear.
Its not what I want either but I tell her, "Tonight, I'm here. With you."

I surrender.

Meaningless?

I'm not a huge fan of Christmas. Now wait...before you rip my head off and roll it down the lane into ten elf pins...let me explain.

Its not that I don't enjoy giving people gifts and watching their surprise as they open them. Its not that I don't enjoy decking the house out with a zillion lights and causing blackouts across our little town. Its not that I don't love being with family and friends and singing Christmas songs as we cook and dance around the kitchen.

It IS because I don't like the commercial side of Christmas and the way kids think of it. And it is because Merry Christmas seems to have become bad words.

I wonder how many of today's kids even know what the meaning behind Christmas is. I bet they think that Christmas is just the day they get to get all kinds of gifts for being good throughout the year or something.
A few years ago, J and I and my family were all sitting around the tree and opening gifts from each other with my three little nieces. I love to see those girls smile, so happy, when they open gifts. But Jade, the oldest of the three, seemed a little...angry.
She had a pile of gifts beside her that dwarfed her and it seemed like she loved everything she got. So, I asked her what was wrong.
J and I always go overboard on the gifts. We will spend outrageous amounts of money on our family and friends. We just really love giving. I remember that year, the girls being older, we had bought each girl like five gifts or something like that. (You always have to give them the same amount of everything or one will get upset thinking you love the other more or something.) And they weren't just toys and clothes. It was educational stuff disguised as cool stuff. Laptop computers, real musical instruments and such.
Jade huffed and crossed her arms across her chest, giving me the dirtiest look.
"What is it?" I asked again.
In all seriousness she scowled and said, "This is it?" She signaled the huge - and I mean huge - pile of gifts beside her. "Last year, you and Aunt J bought us ten times more gifts." She really gave us hell for not giving her twenty gifts or more. J is still shocked at the way she reacted. Honestly, me too.
I blame her parents and my "material" mother. She never even thanked us.
So the next year, all three girls got artwork from me. Winnie the Pooh scenes to hang on their bedroom walls and that was it. I got scowled at for that too but now, they come to expect it from me. And until their parents teach them what Christmas is really about, that is all they will ever get from me and Aunt J.

The other day, we were in the local Walmart. We had a box of cereal and a gallon of milk as we walked up to the check out line. The nice woman rang us up and as she handed us our change, she smiled and said, "Merry Christmas."

I was stunned. I have not had a stranger say that to me in years. I smiled so big that it hurt and said, "Merry Christmas to you too."
When we got out to the car, J grabbed my hand and said, "I can't believe she said that. It was so cool."
I have to explain. Excluding this last year, we lived in South Florida. Ft. Lauderdale to be exact. No one...not a single person...says Merry Christmas down there. I swear, its like the words have become illegal. The words have become offensive. WTF? Right?
Now, I know that not everyone is Christian and such. Hell, I'm not even Christian...I'm Wiccan. But still...what the hell is wrong with saying Merry Christmas?
I talked with my mom last night. She absolutely loves Christmas. She will go get her nails done in a Christmas design. She has Christmas pins that she will wear every day in December. She even puts Christmas decorations in her cars. Her house is decked out with lights and figures all over the place. The inside is so decorated that you would think you walked into Santa's workshop or something. Get it...she loves the holiday.
On the phone, she was upset. The company she works for (a very well known company) had so many complaints two years ago about the Christmas tree and decorations they had in the lobby that, last year, they didn't even bother to decorate. Complaints! When I asked her who complained she said it was the melting pot of different religious people that she worked with. Yet, the company decorated all of these holidays but the only holiday they felt was offensive was Christmas. Crazy, huh.
Hopefully the company will decorate this year.

I guess really, Christmas just doesn't have the same meaning anymore and for that, I'm not a fan.

Snow Day Trip

Saturday, it was supposed to snow in my neighborhood. Every weather man I watched said it was at least an 80 percent chance.

They all lied.

So J and I got up early. It was a quest...to find the snow. We stopped in Helen and watched the parade - freezing to death I should add. I took a ton of pictures and we caught handfuls of candy that were being thrown out of the moving vehicles. (Yes, all of that said candy is gone. I plead the fifth.) We did our best to embarrass our roommate that was walking in the parade for her hotel, whistling and shouting her name. We caused quite a scene. But it was all for laughs.




Clowns and horses and such made their way down the street. We even saw a huge Cabbage Patch Doll. Supposedly, they were born right down the road in Cleveland. But my favorites of the parade were Cat in the Hat and Grinch. And of course, Santa and Mrs. Santa.


After the parade, we drove over to Cleveland. We didn't find snow, but we did find food. Fast food, that is...not my fave. My motto...Just say no to McDonald's. Really. Everything there makes me sick. But J has a belly of her own and was having a Big Mac attack. I made her take me to Wendy's.

With our bellies satisfied, we made a decision. If we were going to find the elusive snow, we were going to have to go up. Way up. Armed with my camera at the ready, we headed for Brasstown Bald. Its the highest point in the state of Georgia (4,784 ft above sea level).



We drove back through Cleveland heading toward Helen. I got a few great pictures of Yonah Mountain.



Once we were back through Helen, we got on the scenic highway and started our ascent. It didn't take long for us to find the snow. Gradually, the world around began to fade to white.




We passed over the Appalachian Trail and pulled over. Actually, we slid over. The road was all ice. We were pretty much at the half way point. I couldn't resist, I had to get out of the truck and play with the snow and ice. My hands complained for about two hours after, but it was worth it. J wouldn't budge from the driver seat, so I tossed snowballs at the window of the truck until she was laughing uncontrollably.

I braved the ice paved road and crossed it. In a month or two, the icicle covered wall will be nothing more than a huge wall of ice. But for now, it was just riddled with smaller icicles. I had to take a picture.



When I got back in the truck, J informed me that we should probably turn back. The road was covered in ice and she was concerned for our safety. Since I had walked across that ice, I agreed without an argument. She hit the four-wheel drive and turned us around (it wasn't as easy as it sounds) and we headed back home.





But our quest to find the mysterious snow that was supposed to cover our town was a success. Even if it wasn't, it would have been a great day...just me and my girl on a scenic drive through the mountains.

Honest Scrap...I'm such a slacker

So...DTB has passed an award my way. Honest scrap. Thank you...

I think its easy to be honest when this blog is really anonymous. Except for my friends at the CLC (which I've asked them to stop reading), Jenophobic, and my younger sister, no one that I've physically met reads this. J knows about it but the chances of her actually reading it...slim. And that's what keeps this blog honest.

In accepting this award, I believe I am supposed to confess my sins. No...wait. That is what I was supposed to do at church Friday night(instead, I snuck out the front door). No...I'm supposed to tell you all ten things about myself and pass this on to ten "Honest Scrap" worthy bloggers.

On with the honesty...

1. I spent twelve years with a very demanding, mentally abusive man. Looking back, I wasn't anything more than a well trained pet when I was with him. And for that, I became the queen of TMI - too much information. He'd drill me if I went anywhere without him and he demanded every detail. In my nine years with J, she has been helping me stop this. It was so ingrained in my head that it became habit. A bad habit - very bad habit.

2. I'm a bit of a perfectionist. Especially when it comes to my writing. I have four books finished but I have yet to attempt sending them in. I just don't feel they are ready...or maybe its that I don't feel I am ready. Either way, they are just sitting here waiting for my perfectionist ass to deem them worthy of being read by someone other than myself.

3. This is going to sound cold, but I really don't miss my family as much as I think I should. It has been a year and two months since I moved away from Florida and just the thought of going back down there makes my head hurt. I have two younger siblings that I have probably only visited a dozen or two times in their 6 and 4 years of existence. This fact makes me feel like my father and I hate it.

4. I love cartoons and animated movies. And I really miss getting up bright and early Saturday mornings while the rest of the house is asleep and watching good ol' Bugs and Road Runner and such. Honestly, I have no idea if they still show those cartoons and the chances of me getting up that early are nil. My favorite old cartoon was Speed Racer (hence the nick - Speed) and my favorite films would be Monster's Inc., Cars, and Alice in Wonderland.

5. Going along with the above info...I am a huge Mickey Mouse and Disney fan. I have a collection of Disney films that would rival the collection of any kid under the age of ten. Ha! Really, I have boxes and boxes and boxes of Mickey and Disney stuff. From stuffed animals to figurines to movie posters to collectibles and so on. I even did a college thesis on Disney and can tell you a zillion useless facts about Walt and the company he started.

6. Speaking of college - I only went for one semester. Sadly, I can't blame the fact that I didn't go back on money. I had saved enough money to put myself through the first two years of college with no worries. The reason I didn't go back...because my aunt - a woman I considered my second mother - died in a car accident. This set off a two year spiral of "fuck the world" and "I'm angry at God" depression that almost got the best of me.

7. Music is what brought me out of that spiral. I wrote a song about her that helped me express all the things that haunted me. Two of those being that I never had a chance to say goodbye or to tell her how much I loved her. You'd have to hear the song to understand why those two things were so important and how I finally came to terms with all of it. This song has been performed by me at several funerals (and other places).

8. Music, art, and writing have always been my great escape. Life wasn't always so great for me so I made up lives that I thought were great and lived creatively through my pen or paintbrush or guitar. It was easier than being me. Strangely, I no longer paint but now LIFE IS GOOD.

9. I have been called accident prone or Grace but really I think crazy is a more fitting word. I lack what most people let rule them...fear. I take everything to the limit and never hold back. The way I see it, you only live this life once. And "thoughts are things" and fear is a thought. If you fear it, you will eventually bring it upon yourself. Manifestation is real. Hey...its just what I believe.

10. Finally. This was harder than I thought. I had to go through all my mental files and try to remember what I had already written about. I'm sure number 9 is scattered throughout this blog but still... And on to number 10... I truly enjoy writing this blog and sharing things that I really don't share with anyone else (besides J) with all the people that read this. It has been very humbling watching the number of readers grow. Thanks. And I really enjoy reading all the blogs of others too. You all make the Internet world interesting.

Now on to giving this award away. I'm not sure if I can give away ten but I will try. So in no particular order...

1. Solo Homo at Solohomo.

2. The Asphalt Cowboy at Musings From the High Speed Rodeo.

3. Jess at This Life is Mine.

4. Jen at Dyke Evolution.

5. Jenophobic at Psychotic...Neurotic.

If you have gotten the award before, you deserve it again...haha. Five is all I can do at the moment unless I can give one back to DTB...lol.

Quickie

Uh...short on time as usual, but I got an award! Thank you DTB.

I promise I will post it as soon as I get back from the parade.

Art of pencil

I've been quite busy these past two weeks. My lack of posts is evident. And, sorry, but this isn't going to be a post either. BUT....I am going to share more art.

This is Vanessa. I've drawn her before. This one was done in .555 drawing pencil.

I promise I will get back to posting the other stuff soon.