Aftermath

Silly, but I just NOW realized how much J had missed me while I was gone. I hadn't realized until this moment that since she picked me up from the airport until right now, we have been together. I mean, she has not left my side. Everywhere she's gone she's taken me with her. Everywhere I've wanted to go, she's gone with me. And when she left earlier to go to her grandmothers, she must have asked me a million times if I was sure I didn't want to go. And then she said, "I don't like it when I'm not with you."

I missed her too and I miss her right now.

Anyway, since I have a little time and its been a while...Back Then...

Now matter how hard I scrubbed that morning, I still felt dirty. The sketchy details of the night before's events were enough to make me puke. I allowed Rich to touch me. I allowed him to kiss me. And what scared me the most was all the details I couldn't remember. The only thing I was sure of was that we didn't have sex.

Two days. Two more days until school started. I just had to avoid everyone for two days. Sounded easy enough. Hmph.

By the time I got out of the shower, Mom was home. I said hello and good morning but went straight to my room. I pulled on some sweats and a tank, opened up my sketch book, and pulled on my headphones. I'm sure I've mentioned before that I'm a huge Joan Jett fan. So I turned Joan up as loud as I could and tried like hell to block out the rest of the world.

Sometime around my fifth or so drawing and my third Joan tape, Mom came in my room and lifted my headphones from my ears.
"I guess you had some friends over last night," she grinned.
"A few. But no one was inside, I promise. Well, except for LG but that was only for five minutes," I explained. "How did you know?"

She took my sketch book and flipped through the pages. "The trash can was full of alcoholic containers. No one left here drunk, did they?"

"No. No one left until early this morning."

"Were you drinking?" she asked.

It wasn't a lie. "No, I wasn't." I knew I didn't drink but I had no idea what I did have in my system.

"Good. I trust you," she smiled. "LG's out front. She says she needs to talk to you." I started to protest but Mom stopped me. "I tried to get her to go away but she says its very important and says she won't leave until you come and talk to her."

I groaned and rubbed my hands over my face. "All right."

I got up and pulled on a T-shirt as I rummaged through my drawer for some socks. Mom sat on the edge of my bed watching me with curiosity.

"What is going on between you and LG? I know you have been trying to stay away from her. Is there something I might be able to help you with?" Her concern made me want to answer.

But that question I couldn't answer truthfully. "It's cool, Ma. Like I said before, I just don't like some of the people she hangs out with. And, well, she's not really a good friend."

Mom stood and walked towards my door. "Do you want me to tell her that I forbid you from hanging out with her?"

"Nah. It will ruin your "cool Mom" reputation," I joked.

Mom laughed and left the room.

I slipped into my Airwalks and grabbed my smokes as I headed for the door.

LG was leaning against the wall behind the door. I was beginning to hate that damn smirk of hers. I lit a smoke and stood next to her. "What is so important?" I asked.

She stood up straight and turned so that she was facing me. I guess she wanted a good view of my face so she knew whether or not she needed to run or take cover. "I was going to head over to RM's later and wanted to know if you were gonna come too."

"Nah. Thanks. What the hell makes you think I would want to go anyway? I can't stand that jerk." I should have known her next words were going to sting when she took a step back.

"Because your boyfriend will be there," she smiled.

I choked on the smoke and dropped my cigarette. "Real funny, LG. I don't have a fucking boyfriend." I looked in her eyes as she kept smiling at me. That smile that meant she knew something I didn't but should. "What the fuck, LG."

"Man, I guess you were more messed up than we thought. Rich asked you out last night and you," I clenched my fists and she took another step back, "you said yes."

"The fuck I did. Bullshit." I got in her face. "This is just another one of those fucking lies you made up so you can hang out with RM. I'm not playing along. If you want to be with RM then break up with KK so you don't have to make up all these fucking stories and lies." I shoved her out of the way and started in the front door.

"If you don't believe me, ask Sam."

I paused for a second. What did she know about Sam?

LG grabbed my shoulder. "What is it with you two anyway? She kept sneaking you off last night."

"Its none of your fucking business," I hissed. It wasn't. And God knows that if LG did know what was going on between me and Sam, everyone in the neighborhood would know. "Leave her out of this."

"Hey," LG put her hands up in surrender, "all I know is that she seemed a little upset after Rich asked you out and you said yes. So yeah, if you don't believe me, ask her."

LG was still talking but I was feeling kind of numb. I walked in the house and slammed the door behind me. I was tempted to try and call Sam but I figured if what LG said was true, then I needed to see her in person. I don't know why I felt that way. Its not like there was anything between us anyway except a few hot make out sessions. She had a horrible boyfriend and I was pretty sure she wasn't going to leave him to be with me. And I was thinking...hmph, like I would ever seriously date a girl.

Teenagers. So little do we actually know sometimes.

Looked like I was going to show up at a party after all.